An Emotional Realization
Bruh. I was just working on my Prolog code for an assignment and listening to She Has No Time by Keane when I suddenly started thinking about my mom. It was because of a dream I hadâa really nice dream. It was basically the best version of my family.
A family that I would love to be part of.
I started thinking about how I would tell that story to my mom, but then my mind shifted to what she currently doesnât have. From what I know, she doesnât receive any love from my dad. And thatâs a big deal.
Her whole purposeâwhat she truly wantsâis to have an amazing family, one that loves each other deeply. But in my opinion, the only thing stopping that from happening is my father.
Overwhelmed with Emotion
Thinking about all of this suddenly made me tear up. I stopped the music, stopped working, and just started crying. Literal tears running down my cheeks.
It happened so fast. I donât even know how it hit me like that, but it did. Itâs crazy.
What I Can Do for Her
I think the best thing I can do for her is just give her time. Thatâs what she wantsâjust to spend time with me. Sheâs so incredibly proud of me, and she wants to feel like she has played a part in my success.
And now, as Iâm thinking about all of this, sheâs literally calling me.
My Goal for Winter Break
She wants to feel like I belong to her, that my success is something she has influenced. But more than anything, she just wants to be with me. And spending time together naturally fulfills all those other desires she has.
So thatâs my goal for this winter breakâto spend as much time with her as possible. So that, God willing, she feels more connected with me.