Struggling with Self-Assessment and Mindfulness
I’m finding it increasingly difficult to quantify or rate my day. It’s frustrating because I feel like I’m just going through the motions of life without actually living it. Especially in the past month, I’ve been trying to reach out and sell myself, but I’m not getting anything in return, which is very disheartening. Typically, I have periods when either my Git commits or YouTube uploads are flourishing, but recently, neither has been the case. It’s annoying to dwell on.
I wish I could regain the momentum I had back in Ramadan when I was consistently productive. The key seems to be mindfulness and intentionality, but I’m not sure I’m doing well in that regard. Even though I recognize the importance of these qualities, I struggle to practice them fully, especially in my work. I’m only intentional about my fitness routine at the gym.
Pursuing Intentional Reflection and Expression
I’ve started putting things on paper recently, which might be a step in the right direction. Reflecting and writing down my experiences feels essential, especially after all that I’ve endured over the past few months. I wish to create art from my reflections, to capture and preserve the valuable lessons I’ve learned regarding friendships, relationships, work, stress, and consistency.
For this, I need to cultivate discipline and dedicate time to reflective practices. I wonder if this challenge of managing distractions and staying mindful mirrors the experience of parenting. Having friends around, who sometimes feel like constant distractions, makes it difficult to focus and be mindful, much like how parents must constantly navigate the interruptions from their children.